This is a new section where I expound, profess, express, profound, regress . . . all the usual. [1]
The Axe Effect
Axe/Tag body spray is a product with genius marketing strategy:
"Axe Deodorant Bodyspray is the all-over bodyspray with long-lasting fragrance and effective deodorant protection designed to seduce the ladies. If you spray it, they will come."
In real life, all girls know that Axe smells gross and has no drawing power. All females avoid the scent.
My friend Hannah says this is an example of how false advertising can make people buy anything.
But I say no - Axe is the result of some brilliant feminist infiltration!
Here's how it when down.
Woman A, after a bad experience with a d-bag, is talking to her friends about dating:
Woman A: "He seemed so nice. But then I came back from the bathroom and he was all over the waitress, and in public! I had to run home to wash the skeeze off me."
Friends: "Aww . . . "
Woman A: "There's a lot of strong, intelligent, respectable guys out there, but how in the world am I supposed to separate the good ones from the jerks?"
Woman B who happens to be a chemical engineer: "I know! If we could get them all to wear this anti-pheromone spray I just developed . . ."
Friends: "How do we get them to do that?"
Woman C who happens to be in advertising: "Well . . ."
And they came up with a campaign. They found a target demographic: the kind of young males inclined to believe that they could douse themselves in a $5 bottle of chemicals and therefore induce hordes of females to chase after them. They made it smell bad to girls, and okay to boys.
The avoidance success rate still hovers around 93%. Girls have been able to avoid encounters after sniffs from distances anywhere between 50 and 150 meters. "Nice guy" dates are up 34 percent.
Axe also causes girls to deepen their understanding and appreciation for regular boy smell.
So thank you, whoever is behind Axe.
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